I've always wanted to be a writer, like the next JK Rowling or Stephenie Meyer (I want people to go crazy for my writing, I don't really want to be uber rich). I just want to write something that someone else would find worth reading. Oddly enough (not really actually) I think the genre I would write for would be Young Adult. So much variance exists within that genre, it can be fantastical, fictional, non-fictional, serious, funny, sad, real, fake, unbelievable, believable, etc. etc. I just feel like there is so much room in that genre and I think my target audience for what I write right now would be young adults.
However, there is an issue getting in the way of me writing professionally, well several actually. Number 1, I have to spend more time writing. As it stands, I do not write a lot, and when I do write it's random and sporadic (I think that was redundant, oh well). I don't really go back to a story if it doesn't hold me right away, which tells me that nothing has grabbed me and shaken me and said "This is amazing! Tell me where they are going, what they are doing! I must find out what happens to this!" Nope, not-a-one has physically and mentally grasped me.
Now there are some things I write and re-write, but I think I do that for my own personal benefit. Two of my stories are about car accidents. One is about an accident I was in that heavily weighed on me for a few years, and another was an accident that I was a first responder to (and by first responder I mean the car was wrapped around the tree in my front lawn) both were scary and deeply emotionally damaging on many levels and I find myself writing about them from time-to-time.
There is one story that I've actually written about 70 or so pages on, though it is not a cohesive piece yet. It's mostly just different scenes and I have yet to figure out how to sew them together. And there in lies the issue, my friends. Writing seems easy, until you try to piece things together. It needs to make sense and it needs to fit. I don't just write from beginning to end, I write here and there when an idea comes into my head.
Back to my issues with writing professionally. Number 2, I'm deathly afraid of having anyone read my writing. I am extremely sensitive, and though I can handle constructive criticism and I understand it's necessity to writing, I am deeply deeply afraid of having someone rip my story to itty bitty shreds. I'm very self-conscience, if you will. Now if it is a paper I write for school, I'm fine, but something that I created, that I put the sweat, tears, and emotion into, that's something all-together different. It's a piece of me, part of me, and to have someone criticize it is like having someone criticize me. Now, I've had my mom and sister and other friends read my work, they like it, tell me it's great, but come on, they're supposed to. Their job is to care about my well-being, not one of them is going to say, "Yuck, terrible, it's toilet paper at best!"
Sometimes this insecurity makes me afraid to write, so I get stuck. In the end, I know I should (and I do) write for myself. So that is what I'm working on. And in the end, I'd rather try and get ripped up, then never try at all.
Maybe, to become more fearless in writing, I will use this blog as a forum for posting some of my writings. Hmm...now that's something to ponder. And until I'm a world famous JK Rowling/Stephenie Meyer type writer, I will be happy just teaching literature to young adults (because I really do like that too!).
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Kristi, I've just read your comments about wanting to "be a writer" of YAL. I applaud your putting that dream into writing. It is most certainly within your grasp, and a wonderful aspiration for one who also aspires to TEACH CAL. No one is a better teacher of writing than a good teacher who also practices the craft of writing. I once say this poster in a middle school English classroom:
ReplyDeleteIf you want to be a writer, read.
If you want to be a writer, be a good observer.
If you want to be a writer, practice writing.
That's it IN A NUTSHELL.
It's very hard to practice writing while going to school, working, being a teacher. But keeping a notebook of your observations, snippits from conversations that your overhear, ideas to write about, interesting words...etc. is a good place to start, and thats notebook can be a wonderful model for your future students.
If you are VERY serious about becomign a writer, Hamline has an MA in writing for children (which includes teens) that is very good and almost always ends in publication. It could be a next step for you.
Goethe said: Whatever you dream, begin it now.
Bonnie